I woke up, and re-read the message I sent last night, and for some reason, it was almost spelled correctly lol and it was just a good way to put everything I felt. We've been messaging each other back and forth all day. I just don't know. Part of me wants to just mail the damn chain so I don't have to see him, but he wants to come and get it so he can see me. I'm scared of what will happen if we see each other.
Other than that...
I feel the need to shake things up this summer. Hence my want for that piercing and the tattoo. I want to just have fun. I want to work, make my money, and spend my days off doing fun and exciting things. My friends at home have the opposite schedule from me, and when we do hang out, it usually consists of chilling at my friends houses, doing nothing. Because we can never agree on something to do, or someone can't go, or someone doesn't have money. I'm so bored with my life here. It's predictable and boring, and I'm just so over doing the same shit all of the time.
And I want to visit my friends from school, but I usually only get one day off a week...so it's hard to find the time. And they're not so cool with giving me days off when I ask for them...soooo....
I guess I'm gonna focus on me, and trying to find crap to do with my free time. Focus on my writing, my poetry, my music...
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I didn't even know what complacency meant until I looked it up on dictionary.com but I think it's a good way to sum things up for yourself. As far as summer is concerned I think thats a wonderful idea fo ryou to concentrate on yourself. After all you do come 1st and if you aren't putting yourself as #1 thats when things get out of hand I am also trying to do the same. I am tired of trying to make everyone else happy and forgetting about me it isn't fair to myself. So i say go for it.
ReplyDeleteI agree and first of all you should call your roommate from college more often because you know she is always down to do some crazy stuff with ya...lol anyways back to the point, focusing on yourself is the greatest thing to do, you have the most fun because you are satisfying your needs over the needs of others and since you're such a giving person, it will be the greatest vacation for you. Do you Samalamma, you better get it!
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